Day 2, 13.3.7

A busy day today. I remain fixated on Mum eating as much as possible, so today have made pumpkin soup which went down a treat. I’ve also tempted her with apple juice, grapes, a banana sprinkled with sugar (the sugar was her idea!), leftover bolognaise for lunch, and a high fibre cereal with fruit for breakfast. Her appetite is really no problem at the moment!

I’ve made loads of phone calls: to the solicitor to get a copy of Dad’s will and the title of the house, to Dad’s nursing home to explain to the family liaison officer what’s happening with Mum, to the palliative care people to refer Mum to them, to MEPACS – a service which provides personal alarms to people, to the GP to check that she was ok working with someone who needed palliative care, and to make an appointment.

(Just got interrupted, the cat did a big stinky shit about a metre away from me and I had to move it or die!).

We went to see the GP. She was very good, she’s someone I’ve worked with for a long time and knows my partner and I. Mum’s having pain in her back on the right side opposite her liver. She had pneumonia about four years ago and her chest sounded crackly which could be a left over from this. The GP wants us to get this checked by the oncologist on Thursday. She also thinks a bone scan will be necessary to see if the cancer has gotten into her bones. The appointment just about wiped Mum out. Mum is pretty deaf and so hearing people takes some effort, ok if you’re well, tiring if you’ve got terminal cancer. The GP said that constipation is going to become a problem because of the medication Mum is taking, so Coloxyl & Senna and Metamucil daily is non-negotiable.

When I got home after running around getting the meds, returning something for the computer, buying an antenna for Mum’s tv, and collecting Mum’s Tattslotto winnings ($45) the palliative care referral person called. She was sensational. I was able to tell her that I’m doing a lot of this alone because my brother is a long way away, and we don’t have any other relatives in Australia, and I’m flying blind. Also that I’m concerned that Mum is experiencing more pain than she should be. She explained the difference in the two types of oxycontin tablets Mum has – one is a slow release and the other is a quick release, so if she’s getting breakthrough pain take the quick release, and/or panamax. If this doesn’t touch it give her more 20-30 minutes later and keep doing this until the pain is controlled. Apparently there’s no limit with palliative care, you keep administering the medication until the pain is controlled. I have to keep a record of what pain killers Mum is taking as this will help to indicate whether the slow release medication has to be increased, ie if she’s taking a lot extra then she might need to have more of the slow release. She said she’d call again after our appointment with the oncologist. Apparently he’s pretty good as oncologists go. It seems they will take Mum on as a client of their service which I was relieved to hear.

Mum told me today that she has asked the Anglican minister who visited her in hospital to preside at her funeral, and she’s told Suzanne what music she wants. Of course I teared up at this point, but was relieved that Mum has organized this. Suzanne was very nice and funerals where the minister has never met the person are just horrible.

The plan is for me to go to work tomorrow, just for four hours. I don’t know how this will go, either in terms of Mum being here on her own or me being able to concentrate but I’ll give it a go.

The landscaper started today, they’ve excavated a lot ready for the pavers. They’ll be here tomorrow as well, and then three days next week.

Dinner is lamb chops that I’ve marinated in wine, lemon, olive oil and rosemary, probably with a little salad and some sweet potato.

Things to remember to do:
Neverfail
Print Carer’s allowance form & health professional form
Oncologist – Mum’s pain, pain in left back, bone scan
Call Karl tomorrow
Do mail redirection
Copy title of house
Get copy of Dad’s will
Contact the minister
Appointment with GP next week